Why use the Compliment Sandwich?

This compliment sandwich is so delicious. I can't even taste the devastating criticism.

You’re not 100% happy with the world around you. No one is.  There are bosses we dislike, friends who annoy us, significant others who just don’t get it.

When it’s too much to handle you sneak off to the closet, clutching a box of cinnamon Teddy Grahams, wearing only your worn out Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle boxers. There you’ll cry for hours, secretly hoping someone will discover you, cradle you in her arms, whisper in your ear and say “Everything’s going to be alright.”

But no one ever comes.

I’m here to tell you that you’re not alone.

There are tens, maybe even twenties like you. And they are all living pleasant and fulfilling lives.

How? They have all mastered the secret weapon for dealing with inadequate people.

That weapon is the Compliment Sandwich.

The compliment sandwich is a tool for correcting the behavior of others while fooling them into thinking they are receiving praise.

Now I know what you’re thinking. “Didn’t I learn about the compliment sandwich in third grade?”

Yes, you did.

You must be smart for remembering that. Sadly, you made such a pathetic waste of your early twenties, that relearning third grade concepts might be beneficial. And, those shoes look great on you.

You ready to learn about the compliment sandwich now?

Of course you are, because I just used a compliment sandwich on you. While you were so busy feeling self-satisfied about how smart you are for remembering the compliment sandwich, I told you that you’re worthless, neglected future would be improved by my article. But before you could understand this, I complimented your shoes, which do look great by the way.

It’s that simple. Just slap any two compliments around your constructive criticism, like the bread on either side of a sandwich. Any two compliments will do for an effective compliment sandwich. Here are some examples.

If you think of any more, please leave them in the comments below.

“Hey Rod, can you come into my office? Boy your teeth are white! Your conduct as a governor was a tragic, despicable carnival of violated human ethics. How do you get your ties so perfectly knotted?”

“Santa, could we talk for a second? You look so cool cruising in that slay. I wish you weren’t such a conceited slob, the only man on Earth who feels self-righteous about only working one day a year and spending the rest in a vomiting, drunken stupor. Your dimples! How merry!”

“Unicorns, gather round. I just wanted to let you know how majestic you all look. Could you please stop devouring human flesh and clothing yourself in the skins of your kills? Wow, what a pretty rainbow!”

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